Friday, May 3, 2013

THE WIVES OF THE PROPHET (SAW) - ZAINAB BINT JAHSH (RA) - NOTES & AUDIO


By Shaikh Abdullah Faisal


WIVES OF THE PROPHET SERIES ::: ZAYNAB BINT JAHSH
By Shaykh Abdullah Faisal
PalTalk – April 28, 2013

Zaynab Bint Jahsh

- The first wife was Khadija, the second was Sawdah,
-Aisha was the third, Hafsa the fourth, Umm Salamah the 5th
-and Zaynab bint Jahsh the 6th
-she was very close to the Prophet (saws)
-in the sense that she was his first cousin

She was the daughter of Umaimah bint 'Abdul Muttalib bin Hashim, who was the Messenger of Allah's paternal aunt. Her brother was the distinguished general, 'Abdullah bin Jahsh. Another brother was a noted author of religious poetry, Abu Ahmad bin Jahsh. Her sister was another famous women Companion, Hamnah bint Jahsh. Her paternal uncles were the Leader of the Martyrs' Hamzah bin 'Abdul Muttalib, and 'Abbas bin 'Abdul Muttalib, who was renowned for his works of charity. Her paternal aunt was Safiyyah bint 'Abdul Muttalib bin Hashim.

She was born about thirty years before the Hijrah of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), She was influenced by the teachings of her brother, 'Abdullah bin Jahsh, to convert to Islam. Beautiful, intelligent, wise and of noble birth she was the envy of many.

The increasing popularity and influence of Islam roused a towering rage among the Quraysh; the new converts faced indescribable tortures. Some were made to lie on beds of coal, while others some were dragged naked across the burning desert sands. Still others were wrapped up in straw mats and strung over smoke, to suffocate them. Every day saw new methods of the art of torturing these people who had sworn allegiance to the Allah.

The sole purpose was that they should give up the belief and practices of Islam. Makkah became too small to hold both them and the Quraysh. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) exhorted his followers and friends to be patient and brave, but finally he gave them orders to migrate; first to Abyssinia and then to Al-Madinah. Under the leadership of 'Abdullah bin Jahsh, the Jahsh family set out. The caravan included the blind poet Ahmad bin Jahsh, who was admired for his linguistic mastery. He wrote an epic poem depicting in detail the tortures inflicted by the Quraysh, the reasons for migration and the heroic deeds of the Muslims. This poem is considered to be a masterpiece of Arabic literature.

Time passed peacefully in Al-Madinah, and the ties between the immigrants and the Ansar, the original inhabitants created an atmosphere of brotherly love and affection. It seemed they were members of one united family. The best individual in the society was neither master nor slave, neither man nor woman, neither rich nor poor, but a God-fearing person of good character and morals.

In the context of such an ideal society the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) suggested to his cousin Zaynab that he had decided to get her engaged to Zayd bin Harithah, his adopted son and a freed slave. When Zaynab heard this she was stunned; she told him that she was from a noble family and she was neither keen nor willing to marry a freed slave. She was doubtful if they could get along with each other. He answered that he had chosen Zayd for her and she should accept him. Before Zaynab could answer him, an Ayah was revealed to the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him). This was Ayah of Surat At-Ahzab,

"It is not for a believer, man or woman, when Allah and His Messenger have decreed a matter that they should have any option in their decision. And whoever disbelieves Allah and His Messenger, he has indeed strayed into a plane error." [Noble Quran 33:36]

Thus Zaynab and Zayd were married, but separated as they were from totally different social backgrounds, and their marital life was far from peaceful.

Zaynab was biased and from the very beginning the relations were always strained. Zayd felt that the respect and importance that a husband should get from his wife was never given to him. Disappointed in his marriage, he went to the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) and told him that he was very upset as he and Zaynab seemed totally incompatible. The advice that he received from his mentor, Allah has incorporated in the Noble Quran, "Keep your wife to yourself, and fear Allah." [Noble Quran 33:37]

But in spite of all the best efforts the marriage did not work out, and finally he divorced Zaynab. Arabs thought it was wrong for a man to marry the widow or divorcee of his adopted son. Allah wanted to abolish this uncivilized custom, so He sent the Angel Jibril to tell the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) in secret that Zaynab would one day be his wife. He was very distressed as it was against the accepted norm of behavior. He feared social censure and was very ashamed and embarrassed at the implications. But the decision had been made in the heavens by Allah and soon he received the revelation,

"And (remember) when you said to him (Zayd bin Harithah) on whom Allah has bestowed grace (by guiding him to Islam) and you have done favour (by manumitting him): "Keep your wife to yourself, and fear Allah." But you hid in yourself that which Allah will make manifest, you did fear the people (i.e., their saying that Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) married the divorced wife of his manumitted slave) whereas Allah had a better right that you should fear Him. So when Zayd had accomplished his desire from her (i.e. divorced her), We gave her to you in marriage, so that there may be no difficulty to the believers in respect of (the marriage of) the wives of their adopted sons when the latter have no desire to keep them. And Allah's Command must be fulfilled." [Noble Quran 33:37]

When Zaynab completed her period of waiting, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) sent her a proposal through Zayd bin Harithah. When he went to her, she was kneading dough; keeping his back turned to her, he gave her the Prophet's message, that he wanted her to join the select group of the Mothers of the believers. She said she could not answer immediately, but would have to consult her Maker. She began praying to Allah for guidance. She was still in the middle of her prayer, when the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) received a revelation that the marriage had already been performed in the Heavens by Allah Himself. After this Heavenly order, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) immediately went to Zaynab without observing any of the formalities that were observed with acquaintances and friends. He did not inform her in advance nor did ask for permission. There are some exceptional points to be noted regarding this marriage.

Only the order of the Quran was based as a guardian or a witness.
It abolished a barbaric custom that equated a blood relationship with an adoptive one; in which the father could not marry an adopted son's ex-wife or widow.

Zaynab used to say very proudly to the other Mother of the Believers that her marriage had been performed not by her family but by Allah above the Heavens with His beloved Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him).

When the hypocrites criticized the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) for this marriage, Allah replied,
"There is no blame on the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) in that which Allah has made legal for him. That has been Allah's way with those who have passed away of (the Prophets of) old. And the Command of Allah is a decree determined. Those who convey the Message of Allah and fear Him, and fear none save Allah. And Sufficient is Allah as a Reckoner." [Noble Quran 33:38-39]

And to clarify the finer points still further he revealed Ayat which again are part of Surat Al-Ahzab,
"Muhammad is not the father of any of your men, but he is the Messenger of Allah and the last of the Prophets. And Allah is Ever All-Aware of everything." [Noble Quran 33:40]

On this occasion Allah revealed the order clarifying the position of adopted sons as,
"Nor has he made your adopted sons your real sons. That is but your saying with your mouths. But Allah says the truth, and He guides to the (Right) Way. Call them (the adopted sons) by (the names of) their fathers, that is more just with Allah." [Noble Quran 33:4-5]

On the occasion of this wedding Allah revealed revelation regarding Hijab and also made it clear that no man could marry any of the Mothers of the Believers after the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him). These two commands were revealed in Ayat of the same Surat,

"O you who believe! Enter not the Prophet's houses, unless permission is given to you for a meal, (and then) not (so early as) to wait for its preparation. But when you are invited, enter, and when you have taken your meal, disperse without sitting for a talk. Verily, such (behavior) annoys the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), and he is shy of (asking) you (to go); but Allah is not shy of (telling you) the truth. And when you ask (his wives) for anything you want, ask them from behind a screen that is purer for your hearts and for their hearts. And it is not (right) for you that you should annoy Allah's Messenger, nor that you should ever marry his wives after him (his death). Verily, with Allah that shall be an enormity." [Noble Quran 33:53]

'A'ishah says that in terms of values and position, Zaynab was her equal. She said she had never seen any other person who was so eager to get closer to Allah to gain nearness to Him she was more charitable than most, and her generous behavior with relatives was impeccable. When 'A'ishah was wrongfully accused, the whole of Al-Madinah was polluted with taunts and filthy talk; in fact even the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) was disturbed. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) asked Zaynab what her opinion was of 'A'ishah. The noble character of this lady is revealed in her answer; she promptly said she did not wish to be involved, and did not want to defile and taint her ears, her eyes and her tongue with such terrible accusations. Swearing by Allah she said, she found 'A'ishah to be a truly God-fearing lady of exemplary character.

She found in her the most wonderful traits of integrity, sincerity and honesty. She said she had not seen in her anything but goodness and virtue. 'A'ishah narrated that Zaynab very easily could have taken advantage of the situation and passed derogatory remarks about her, for after all, in a sense they were rivals. 'A'ishah says she never forgot the fact that she stood by her at the worst time in her life when almost the whole world had turned against her.

On one occasion Zaynab called Safiyyah a Jewess and this deeply distressed the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him). In fact he was so upset that he stopped talking to her. Zaynab felt guilty and realized that she committed a grave mistake and offended the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him). Finally she requested 'A'ishah to advocate her case with him and tell him that she was sincerely repentant; she was the only one who could talk to him in such a direct manner. When the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) visited 'A'ishah, she looked for an opportune moment and brought up the subject, pleading the case for Zaynab. 

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) forgave her and family life returned to normal in the household.

When Zaynab passed away 'A'ishah recalled an occasion when the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), said that among the Mother of the Believers, she would meet him first who had the longest arms. Zaynab was short compared to the others and naturally her arms were also shorter. All the ladies took this statement literally and started measuring their arms. It was only upon the death of Zaynab that they realized what this meant. It really meant that the person with the longest arms was the most generous or liberal person, who only thought of how she could benefit others. There was an implicit prophesy in this statement, which became clear when Zaynab passed away.

It meant she would meet him in Paradise before the others. And she passed away before any of the other wives of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him). 'A'ishah says Zaynab worked with her own hands, and what she thus earned she spent on works of charity. She said she was a God-fearing, straight-forward lady who practiced abstinence. All her actions were aimed at pleasing Allah. Sometimes she could lose her temper, but then she was quick to repent and ask for forgiveness. She was very pure at heart and never carried resentments and grudges.

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) had a very organized routine. After the 'Asr prayers he would visit the different apartments to inquire about the well-being of the ladies of his household. He was always very just in the attention he paid to them and the amount of time he spent with each one of them. Once Zaynab received some special honey from a relative, and it so happened that this was the Prophet's favourite. Whenever she offered it to him he would spend some time longer in her apartment, as it took time to really flavor and enjoy it. The other wives felt impatient and restless waiting for their turn with him. So 'A'ishah, Sawdah, and Hafsah worked out a plan. Each of them would tell him that there was a peculiar smell in his mouth.

And if all of them said the same thing he would certainly believe them and realize that the only thing which could have given him bad breath would have been the honey he just had. Since he was very concerned about personal hygiene, he would definitely stop eating the honey. Of course the three Mothers of the Believers did what they did, not out of spite, but because they loved him and wanted him to come to them sooner. In fact Allah has Himself spoken of them in the highest terms of respect in the Quran.

"O wives of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) you are not like any other women." [Noble Quran 33:32]

And it happened as they planned; the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) developed a distaste for honey and decided he would never eat it again. In the case of an ordinary human being this may not have been a problem. But the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) was swearing not to have something that actually was not forbidden by Allah ; this could lead to any follower of his also for swearing something not forbidden by Allah. So Allah rebuked him, "O Prophet! Why do you forbid (for yourself) that which Allah has allowed to you, seeking to please your wives? And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful." [Noble Quran 66:1]

As a result the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) broke the oath he had taken and performed the penance for this in accordance with the injunctions of Allah.

Zaynab made a little mosque in a corner of her house and used to spend a lot of time there in prayer and meditation. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) would also pray there sometimes. She believed strongly in asking Allah for counsel through prayer and supplication, before taking any action. All her life's major decisions were made in this way. In fact even when the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) proposed she turned to prayer for guidance.

This righteous lady died during the caliphate of 'Umar Faruq at the age of fifty-three. When she realized she was about to meet her Maker, she told the people around her that she already prepared a shroud for herself. If 'Umar Faruq sent one for her, one should be used and the other given away in charity. She was such a modest lady that a curtain was drawn in front of her dead body, even though it was wrapped in a shroud.

'Umar Faruq led the funeral prayers and all her close relatives - Usamah bin Zayd, Muhammad bin' Abdullah bin Jahsh, 'Abdullah bin Abi Ahmad bin Jahsh and Muhammad bin Talhah bin 'Abdullah got down into the grave to lower her gently into her final resting place in Jannatul Baqi'.

She was so generous and soft-hearted that the poor and distressed of the city broke into tears when they heard they lost their benefactress and patron. On her death she left a house which was bought by Walid bin 'Abdul Malik for fifty thousand Dirhams and included by him in the precincts of the Prophet's Mosque at Al-Madinah.

"O the one in (complete) rest and satisfaction! Come back to your Lord - well pleased and well pleasing. Enter you then among My (honored) servants, and enter you My Paradise."[Noble Quran 89:27-30]

And hold fast, all of you together, to the Rope of Allah (i.e. this Qur’an), and be not divided among yourselves, and remember Allah’s Favour on you, for you were enemies one to another but He joined your hearts together, so that, by His Grace, you became brethren (in Islāmic Faith), and you were on the brink of a pit of Fire, and He saved you from it. Thus Allah makes His Ayāt (proofs, evidences, verses, lessons, signs, revelations, etc.,) clear to you, that you may be guided. (Aali Imran 3:103)

And He has united their (i.e. believers') hearts. If you had spent all that is in the earth, you could not have united their hearts, but Allah has united them. Certainly He is All-Mighty, All-Wise. (Al-Anfal 8:63)

-before Islam it was 'big fish eats the small fish'
-Zaid Bin Haritha was from a slave background and Zaynab was from the elite in the society
-so it didn't make sense to her to marry him
-even her brother Abdullah Bin Jahsh (r.a) was against the marriage

It is not for a believer, man or woman, when Allah and His Messenger have decreed a matter that they should have any option in their decision. And whoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger, he has indeed strayed in a plain error. (Al-Ahzab 33:36)

-so Allah (swt) revealed the ayah
-Abu Haneefah says that you can't marry a man to your daughter if he is socially beneath her

"And there is none co-equal or comparable unto Him." (Al-Ikhlas 112:4)

-she didn't even try to make it work and Zaid used to go to the Rasul (saws) to complain
-but he didn't want it break because he wanted it to work

O mankind! We have created you from a male and a female, and made you into nations and tribes, that you may know one another. Verily, the most honourable of you with Allah is that (believer) who has At-Taqwa [i.e. one of the Muttaqûn (pious - see V.2:2). Verily, Allah is All-Knowing, All-Aware. (Al-Hujurat 49:13)

-and this marriage was to break up the tribalism in the society
-it was a taboo to marry the ex-wife of your adopted son
-so when Gibril (a.s) brought the news to him he was distressed

We have not sent down the Qur’an unto you (O Muhammad SAWS) to cause you distress, (Ta-Ha 20:2)

And (remember) when you said to him (Zaid bin Hārithah the freed­slave of the Prophet SAW) on whom Allah has bestowed Grace (by guiding him to Islām) and you (O Muhammad SAW too) have done favour (by manumitting him) "Keep your wife to yourself, and fear Allah." ...

But you did hide in yourself (i.e. what Allah has already made known to you that He will give her to you in marriage) that which Allah will make manifest, you did fear the people (i.e., Muhammad SAWS married the divorced wife of his manumitted slave) whereas Allah had a better right that you should fear Him...

So when Zaid had accomplished his desire from her (i.e. divorced her), We gave her to you in marriage, so that (in future) there may be no difficulty to the believers in respect of (the marriage of) the wives of their adopted sons when the latter have no desire to keep them (i.e. they have divorced them). And Allah’s Command must be fulfilled. (Al-Ahzab 33:37)

-Aisha (r.a) said this ayah was difficult for him to put to practice and that he would have hidden it from the ummah if he could
-the hypocrites took this as an opportunity to smear the character of the Rasul
-and so Allah answered them in surah Ahzab

There is no blame on the Prophet (SAWS) in that which Allah has made legal for him. That has been Allah’s Way with those who have passed away of (the Prophets of) old. And the Command of Allah is a decree determined. (Al-Ahzab 33:38)

Those who convey the Message of Allah and fear Him, and fear none save Allah. And Sufficient is Allah as a Reckoner. (Al-Ahzab 33:39)

Muhammad (SAWS) is not the father of any man among you, but he is the Messenger of Allah and the last (end) of the Prophets. And Allah is Ever All­Aware of everything. (Al-Ahzab 33:40)
Call them (adopted sons) by (the names of) their fathers, that is more just with Allah. But if you know not their father's (names, call them) your brothers in faith and Mawālīkum (your freed slaves). And there is no sin on you if you make a mistake therein, except in regard to what your hearts deliberately intend. And Allah is Ever Oft­Forgiving, Most Merciful. (Al-Ahzab 33:5)
And when you ask (his wives) for anything you want, ask them from behind a screen that is purer for your hearts and for their hearts. And it is not (right) for you that you should annoy Allah’s Messenger, nor that you should ever marry his wives after him (his death). Verily! With Allah that shall be an enormity. (Al-Ahzab 33:53)

Abu Bakr (RA) said: "That entire day, belonged to Talha." [Musnad Abu Dawud at-Tayalisi (1/8) No. 6, Abu Naeem al-Asbahani in 'Hilyatul Awliya' (1/87)]

-she was the biggest rival of Aisha but she was slandered
-Zaynab didn't say anything against her because of her taqwa when she was asked about her opinion
-Aisha was impressed by this
-when the Rasul (saws) ex-communicated Zaynab due to her comment against Saffiyyah
-she turned to Aisha for help and she interceded on her behalf to the Rasul
-she called Saffiyyah a Jew when she had already taken her shahadah
-he ex-communicated her for 3 months
-she was the first one among the wives to die
-she used to have honey in her house and the Rasul used to stay long time there drinking the honey

O Prophet! Why do you ban (for yourself) that which Allah has made lawful to you, seeking to please your wives? And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. (At-Tahrim 66:1)

-and the wives plotted against him to make him stop spending long time there
-so the Rasul stopped drinking honey so Allah revealed (66:1)

Allah will not punish you for what is unintentional in your oaths, but He will punish you for your deliberate oaths; for its expiation (a deliberate oath) feed ten Masākin (poor persons), on a scale of the average of that with which you feed your own families; or clothe them; or manumit a slave. But whosoever cannot afford (that), then he should fast for three days. That is the expiation for the oaths when you have sworn. And protect your oaths (i.e. do not swear much). Thus Allah make clear to you His Ayāt (proofs, evidences, verses, lessons, signs, revelations, etc.) that you may be grateful. (Al-Ma'idah 5:89)

-she died 23 years after hijrah
-the poor were stricken with pain and grief because she was generous to them

THE LESSONS FROM THE STORY OF ZAYNAB BINT JAHSH
Continued..
PalTalk – April 29, 2013

-She was one of the great women of Islam
-and whenever you read about the book titled
-“The Great Women Around the Prophet (saws),”
-you will come across her name
-she has secured her place in history for this
-these lessons are important for our sisters
-because when you live in darul harb you forget how to become a proper muslimah

WHAT ARE THESE 30 LESSONS?

1. ZAYNAB HAD THE HONOUR OF BEING THE PROPHET'S FIRST COUSIN

-she married him when she was 35 years old
-and was known for her intelligence and beauty
-her brother reverted her to Islam

2. SHE HAD THE HONOUR OF BEING FROM AL MUHAJIROON

-only the people of taqwa can make hijra

3. THE HOLY PROPHET WAS KEEN TO USE MARRIAGE TO UPROOT TRIBALISM AND THE CLASS SYSTEM

Alert: And say: "Truth has (now) arrived, and Falsehood perished: for Falsehood is (by its nature) bound to perish." [Quran 17:81]

4. PEOPLE FIND IT DISTASTEFUL TO MARRY BENEATH THEIR STATUS

-Abdullah ibn Jahsh didn’t agree to the marriage of Zaynab to Zayd ibn Harith
-because they were from different status

This matter (rule) will remain with the Quraish, and none will rebel against them, but Allah will throw him down on his face, as long as the Quraish uphold the Deen. [Sahih Bukhari, Volume 9, Book 89, Number #253]

5. NOT ALL MARRIAGES ARRANGED BY THE PROPHET WERE SUCCESSFUL

-the marriage he arranged between Zaynab and Zayd was not successful

6. THE PRE ISLAMIC ARABS USED TO TREAT THEIR ADOPTED SONS LIKE THEIR BIOLOGICAL SONS

-they used to take their adopted sons to the ka'ba and make a public announcement
-giving them their own names

7. THE PROPHET FOUND IT DIFFICULT TO IMPLEMENT SURAH 33:37

And (remember) when you said to him (Zaid bin Harithah the freed­slave of the Prophet SAW) on whom Allah has bestowed Grace (by guiding him to Islam) and you (O Muhammad SAW too) have done favour (by manumitting him) "Keep your wife to yourself, and fear Allah." But you did hide in yourself (i.e. what Allah has already made known to you that He will give her to you in marriage) that which Allah will make manifest, you did fear the people (i.e., Muhammad SAW married the divorced wife of his manumitted slave) whereas Allah had a better right that you should fear Him. So when Zaid had accomplished his desire from her (i.e. divorced her), We gave her to you in marriage, so that (in future) there may be no difficulty to the believers in respect of (the marriage of) the wives of their adopted sons when the latter have no desire to keep them (i.e. they have divorced them). And Allah's Command must be fulfilled. (Al-Ahzab 33:37)

-the prophet was afraid of being excoriated (criticized) by others
-but Allah wanted to correct the idea of the adopted son being a biological son
-to teach the Muslims that they are not their biological sons

Allah has not put for any man two hearts inside his body. Neither has He made your wives whom you declare to be like your mothers' backs, your real mothers. [Az­Zihar is the saying of a husband to his wife, "You are to me like the back of my mother" i.e. You are unlawful for me to approach.], nor has He made your adopted sons your real sons. That is but your saying with your mouths. But Allah says the truth, and He guides to the (Right) Way. (Al-Ahzab 33:4)

Call them (adopted sons) by (the names of) their fathers, that is more just with Allah. But if you know not their father's (names, call them) your brothers in faith and Mawalikum (your freed slaves). And there is no sin on you if you make a mistake therein, except in regard to what your hearts deliberately intend. And Allah is Ever Oft­Forgiving, Most Merciful. (Al-Ahzab 33:5)

Khuwaylah bint Tha'labah said, "By Allah! Allah sent down the beginning of Surat Al-Mujadilah in connection with me and 'Aws bin As-Samit. He was my husband and had grown old and difficult. One day, he came to me and I argued with him about something and he said, out of anger, 'You are like my mother's back to me.' He went out and sat with some of his people. Then he came back and wanted to have sexual intercourse with me. I said, 'No, by the One in Whose Hand is the soul of Khuwaylah! You will not have your way with me after you said what you said, until Allah and His Messenger issue judgement about our case.'

He wanted to have his way regardless of my choice and I pushed him away from me; he was an old man.' I next went to one of my neighbors and borrowed a garment from her and went to the Messenger of Allah . I told him what happened and kept complaining to him of the ill treatment I received from 'Aws. He said, "O Khuwaylah! Your cousin is an old man, so have Taqwa of Allah regarding him." By Allah! Before I departed, parts of the Qur'an were revealed about me. Allah's Messenger felt the hardship upon receiving the revelation as he usually did and then became relieved. He said to me, "O Khuwaylah! Allah has revealed something about you and your spouse." He recited to me, [Indeed Allah has heard the statement of her that disputes with you concerning her husband, and complains to Allah. And Allah hears the argument between you both. Verily, Allah is All-Hearer, All-Seer. (Al-Mujadilah 58:1)], until, [And for disbelievers, there is a painful torment. (Al-Baqarah 2:104)] He then said to me, "Command him to free a slave."

I said, 'O Allah's Messenger! He does not have any to free.' He said, "Let him fast for two consecutive months." I said, 'By Allah! He is an old man and cannot fast.' He said, "Let him feed sixty poor people a Wasq of dates." I said, 'O Allah's Messenger! By Allah, he does not have any of that.' He said, "We will help him with a basket of dates." I said, 'And I, O Allah's Messenger! I will help him with another.' He said, "You have done a righteously good thing. So go and give away the dates on his behalf and take care of your cousin." I did that.''' [Musnad Ahmad (6/410) No. 27360]

8. TILL TODAY THE KUFFAAR USE THE MARRIAGE OF THE PROPHET TO ZAYNAB TO ATTACK THE DEEN

-even though the prophet did not want to practice it
-it was the most difficult thing for him to practice

9. ZAYNAB USED TO BOAST ABOUT HER MARRIAGE TAKING PLACE ABOVE THE 7 HEAVENS

-unlike the other wives whose marriage took place in dunya
-this checkmates the people that believe Allah is everywhere

Narrated By Anas: Zaid bin Haritha came to the Prophet complaining about his wife. The Prophet kept on saying (to him), "Be afraid of Allah and keep your wife." 'Aisha said, "If Allah's Apostle were to conceal anything (of the Qur'an he would have concealed this Verse." Zaynab used to boast before the wives of the Prophet and used to say, "You were given in marriage by your families, while I was married (to the Prophet) by Allah from over seven Heavens." And Thabit recited, "The Verse: 'But (O Muhammad) you did hide in your heart that which Allah was about to make manifest, you did fear the people,' (33.37) was revealed in connection with Zaynab and Zaid bin Haritha." [Sahih Bukhari (9/125) No. 7421]

10. THE PIETY OF ZAYNAB BINT JAHSH

-not only was she beautiful
-she had taqwa
When the munafiqoon slandered Aisha, Zaynab spoke good about Aisha
-she did not slander her
-she was not an opportunist

Aisha further said: Allah's Apostle also asked Zaynab bint Jaysh about my case. He said, "O Zaynab! What have you seen?" She replied, "O Allah's Apostle! I protect my hearing and my sight (by refraining from telling lies). I know nothing but good (about Aisha)." Of all the wives of Allah's Apostle, it was Zaynab who aspired to receive from him the same favor as I used to receive, yet, Allah saved her (from telling lies) because of her piety. But her sister, Hamna, kept on fighting on her behalf so she was destroyed as were those who invented and spread the slander. [Sahih Bukhari, Vol 6, Book 60, Hadith #274]

11. HER MARRIAGE ABOLISHED THE JAAHILIYYA CUSTOM OF CONSIDERING THE WIFE OF YOUR ADOPTED SON A TABOO

12. WHEN YOU ARE INVITED TO SOMEONE'S HOUSE FOR A MEAL, DON’T OVER STAY

-don’t even over stay as a guest

Allah said:


O you who believe! Enter not the Prophet's houses, except when leave is given to you for a meal, (and then) not (so early as) to wait for its preparation. But when you are invited, enter, and when you have taken your meal, disperse, without sitting for a talk. Verily, such (behaviour) annoys the Prophet, and he is shy of (asking) you (to go), but Allah is not shy of (telling you) the truth. And when you ask (his wives) for anything you want, ask them from behind a screen, that is purer for your hearts and for their hearts. And it is not (right) for you that you should annoy Allah’s Messenger, nor that you should ever marry his wives after him (his death). Verily! With Allah that shall be an enormity. (Al-Ahzab 33:53)
.
Narrated Anas bin Malik: When the Messenger of Allah (SAWS) married Zaynab bint Jahsh, he invited the people who took their meals and then remained sitting and talking. The Prophet pretended to be ready to get up, but the people did not get up. When he noticed that, he got up, and when he had got up, some of those people got up along with him and there remained three (who kept on sitting). Then the Prophet came back and found those people still sitting. Later on those people got up and went away. So I went to the Prophet and informed him that they had left. The Prophet came, and entered (his house). I wanted to enter (along with him) but he dropped a curtain between me and him. Allah then revealed: 'O you who believe! Do not enter the Prophet's Houses until leave is given... (to His statement)... Verily! That shall be an enormity, in Allah's sight.' (Al-Ahzab 33:53) [al-Bukhari (6271) and Muslim (1428)]

13. ALLAH USED THE HOLY QUR'AN TO CORRECT THE MISTAKES OF THE PROPHET

-because when Zaynab bint Jahsh kept honey in her bedroom, she knew the prophet liked it

O Prophet! Why do you ban (for yourself) that which Allah has made lawful to you, seeking to please your wives? And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. (At-Tahrim 66:1)

14 THE PLOT OF WOMEN IS GREAT

So when he (her husband) saw his [(Yûsuf's (Joseph)] shirt torn at the back; (her husband) said: 

"Surely, it is a plot of you women! Certainly mighty is your plot! (Yusuf 12:28)

15. THE PROPHET (SAWS) PREDICTED WHICH WIFE WOULD DIE FIRST

-i.e. the wife with the long hand first
-meaning the wife who was most charitable

16. MADINA WAS GRIEF-STRICKEN WHEN ZAYNAB DIED

-she used to be a dressmaker
-and spent her earning on the poor
-she used to look after the believers as their real mother

17. FIRST COUSINS ARE ALLOWED TO MARRY IN ISLAM

18. THE PROPHET (saws) PAID KEEN ATTENTION TO FIQHUL WAAQIA
-he told the Muslims to migrate to Abyssinia

19. THE MUNAFIQOON WILL ALWAYS TRY TO ASSASSINATE THE CHARACTER OF THE BELIEVERS
-the orientalist slander the prophet
-they put a spin on the story of the marriage of the prophet to Zaynab
-they said the prophet went to visit Zayd and found her naked and had a liking to her beauty
-he then started making life difficult for Zayd until he divorced his wife for him to marry her (astagfirullah)

20. YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO CALL YOUR ADOPTED SON YOUR FAMILY NAME

Call them (adopted sons) by (the names of) their fathers, that is more just with Allah. But if you know not their father's (names, call them) your brothers in faith and Mawālīkum (your freed slaves). And there is no sin on you if you make a mistake therein, except in regard to what your hearts deliberately intend. And Allah is Ever Oft­Forgiving, Most Merciful. (Al-Ahzab 33:5)
.
21. POLYGAMY IS NOT WAR

-Zaynab came to the defence of Aisha and she did likewise on another occasion
-when Zaynab called Saffia a Jewess and the prophet got upset and boycotted Zaynab for 2 months
-it was Aisha who talked to the prophet to speak to her again

22. A MAN IS ALLOWED TO EX COMMUNICATE HIS WIFE TO PUNISH HER

23. A WOMAN WILL NEVER SETTLE FOR SECOND BEST IF SHE CAN GET THE BEST
-Zaynab bint Jahsh made life difficult for Zayd to divorce her because she wanted to marry the prophet


24. ALWAYS DO ISTIKHARA WHEN YOU RECEIVE A PROPOSAL

-Zaynab made this when the prophet proposed to her
-always do istikhara whenever you want to undertake something
-and you can do istikhara 2 or 3 times
-you make dua to Allah to give you the thing if it is good for you and to protect you from it if it is not
-even after marriage you can make istikhara to make dua to Allah to continue the marriage

25. THERE IS NO GUARANTEE THAT TWO PRACTICING MUSLIMS WILL BE COMPATIBLE

-because there are different types of chemistry
-physical, spiritual, cultural, intellectual chemistries
Zaynab and Zayd were pious Muslims yet not compatible
-their marriage lasted a little over a year
-ad Zayd was desperate to get out of the marriage
-but the prophet kept asking him to fear Allah and keep his marriage
-Don’t be naive to think every practicing Muslims is compatible

26. DO NOT DELAY A DIVORCE IF THINGS ARE NOT WORKING
-because you are only delaying the pain and torture
-this hadith is weak:

Abdullah bin Umar narrated the Messenger of Allah (SAWS) said: "The most hated of permissible things to Allah is divorce." [Sunan Abu Dawud (Vol. 1, pg. 661) No. 2176 and Sunan Ibn Majah (Vol. 3, pg. 180) No. 2018] (Daeef)

27. DO NOT FROWN UPON DIVORCE WOMEN AND SHUN THEM BECAUSE THE PROPHET DID NOT DO SO

-and you are not better than the Prophet (saws)
-who gave you the right to stigmatize against them

28. MARRIAGE TO THE RASUL SALVAGED THE IMAGE OF ZAYNAB BINT JAHSH

-as she then became the mother of the believers

29. ZAYNAB BINT JAHSH WORKED OWNING HER OWN WORKSHOP

-she made things from leather
-and was a dressmaker
-she spent most of her earning on the poor people
So the lesson is a woman is allowed to work if her husband allows it
-so sort these things out during the interview
-don’t wait till after marriage to run to a shaikh crying

30. YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO CALL A PERSON A JEW OR A CHRISTIAN IF THEY TAKE THEIR SHAHADAH

-or call them by their Christian name

It is related by Anas that on one occasion, the Prophet (SAWS) found Safiyyah weeping. When he asked her what the matter was, she replied that she heard that Hafsah had disparagingly described her as 'the daughter of a Jew'. The Prophet (SAW) responded by saying, "You are certainly the daughter of a Prophet (Harun), and certainly your uncle was a Prophet (Moses), and you are certainly the wife of a Prophet (Muhammad), so what is there in that to be scornful towards you?" Then he said to Hafsah, "O Hafsah, fear Allah!" [Abu Naeem al-Asbahani in 'Hilyatul-Awliya' (2/55)]